Love Always
by happinessisnowhere
Summary: Marissa Cooper left to Greece with no harm or foul. Ryan Atwood dates Taylor Townsend. Seth and Summer are there, helping out, and eventually having problems, but don't worry, everything will work out. What happens eight months later when Marissa returns?
1. Goodbye Marissa Cooper

**Completely AU. I hope you all like this, please read and review. But yeah, Marissa actually leaves, and doesn't get killed…**

**Author's note: I do not own The O.C. Completely Josh's.**

The car was full of silence. It was the most awkward thing Marissa has ever gone through. Ryan must be upset that she's leaving, but he has to understand that it's time for her to move on, he just has to understand. "So, Ryan—" Marissa starts to speak, wondering what Ryan might say. Would he start screaming at her? Or would he feel sorry? She just had to know.

"It's okay Marissa, you know I'm there for you," he said with a small smile.

[lovealways]

Ryan woke with a startle. Her words kept ringing in his head. _'Ryan Atwood, I will always love you.'_ He really couldn't believe she was actually gone. Marissa was in Greece, not in Newport, it just didn't make sense. She was meant to stay here and go to Berkeley with him. Ryan rubbed his eyes and looked down at his sheets. He just wanted to call Marissa, and talk to her. He wanted to grab a bite to eat with her, Summer, and Seth.

It was different; he was sitting in the diner with Summer and Seth. They were sitting on one side as Ryan sat on the other, all alone. Usually Marissa would sit next to him, but now… he was by himself. He could feel Summer and Seth's eyes on him, they didn't know what to say to him. Anything they would've said, he would have ignored it. Ryan was playing with the straw sitting in his drink, and would not stop staring at it.

"Hey guys!" they all heard a squeaky tone girl scream. That's what got Ryan's head to jerk up. He really didn't like Taylor Townsend. She was the person who got him kicked out of Harbor, but then again, she got Marissa back in. She came into the booth and sat next to Ryan. His arm was on the back of her part of the chair, but he moved it right away. He was very uncomfortable around Taylor. "What's up?" she asked in a cheery tone.

Summer shrugged. "Nothing," she said sadly. Of course she was sad too, she had lost her best friend, she had no clue what to do with herself without Marissa, but she wasn't as sad as Ryan was.

[lovealways]

Two months later, Ryan and Taylor were in a committed, loving relationship. They had gone through a lot together—of course, not as much as Ryan and Marissa went through, but still.

[lovealways]

Taylor had woken up Ryan one morning with coffee, and they talked for an hour. Taylor made Ryan laugh, and smile, but it didn't feel the same as before. The door burst open as Ryan gave Taylor a peck on the lips. Sandy was standing in the doorway, staring at them. "Sandy…" Taylor started. She looked very worried, but Ryan laughed. This had happened many times, he doesn't really care anymore.

But Sandy wasn't laughing. Ryan got serious with him. "What's wrong?" he asked.

"Could you please come in the kitchen for a minute, you can come to if you'd like Taylor," Sandy said.

Ryan nodded and got out of his bed. He slipped his slippers on and walked out of the pool house with Taylor behind him. He walked in to see Summer and Seth sitting on the high chairs and staring at Julie and Kaitlin. Everybody was there. Kirsten stood there holding coffee and looking at Ryan. Nobody was talking. "What's going on?" Taylor asked awkwardly.

Julie walked towards Ryan with a letter in her hand. "Ryan, we received this letter this morning. It says it was delivered two months ago. It was for you, from Marissa. I guess it got lost in the mail," she explained. "We came right over when we saw it," she said.

"Yeah, she didn't even let me brush my hair," Kaitlin mumbled.

Julie ignored Kaitlin's comment and handed Ryan the letter. Taylor jumped a little. She thought Marissa was out of their lives for sure. She knows it was bad, by Taylor's life was so much better since Marissa left; she had gotten Ryan, and Summer, and Seth. It wasn't fair what Marissa was doing.

Ryan shook his head when he looked at the letter in Julie's hand. "I don't want to read it," he finally said after a minute of silence. He pushed Julie's hands towards her stomach.

"Ryan—" Kirsten started.

"I don't want to read it," he repeated.

He walked over to the table and sat at the head of the table. He didn't make eye contact with anyone. Summer looked at Seth and jerked her head towards Ryan. Seth sighed and walked over to the table, he took the seat next to Ryan and whispered, "Ryan, Marissa would want to read it." He scoffed. "I know it's not like she's dead, and you could email her, but she wrote you this letter when she left. She probably needs you to read it soon," Seth explained.

Ryan nodded and stood up. He grabbed the letter from the counter and walked towards the door. He stopped and turned to everyone. "I just need to be alone for a minute," he said, then walked out the door.

"Oy humbug," Seth said.

"Seth, it's not Christmas," Kirsten said. Seth was about to say something, but Kirsten shook her head. He shrugged.

Ryan got into the pool house and opened the letter.

_Dear Ryan,_

_I hope you're going to understand by the end of this letter._

_I'm sorry I left so suddenly, but it's the only way we could stay normal. You should know that you're the reason I stayed in Newport for so long, and I thank you for that. _

_But I'm also sorry, for everything. But you stuck with me from the thick and thin. _

_I want you to laugh, Ryan, I want you to live, and I most definitely want you to love again. _

_I still love you Ryan Atwood. You saved me. _

_Love always, Marissa._

Ten minutes later Ryan heard a knock on the door. "Ryan?" he heard Summer say.

"Yeah!" he shouted, trying to forget about Marissa. He got up and opened the door. Summer, Taylor, and Seth were standing in the doorway waiting to hear what Marissa said in her letter.

"So…" Seth said.

Ryan walked back to his bed and the rest followed. Ryan sighed. "She said that she loved me, and that I shouldn't blame myself. She said that we should move on," Ryan said. He looked at Taylor. "Which I did."

[lovealways]

6 MONTHS LATER.

"Daddy!" Marissa Cooper shouted in pain. She really didn't want to leave her dad now.

He shrugged. "I'm sorry kiddo. It's just over," he explained.

"Well, where are you sending me?" she asked.

"Um, guess."

[lovealways]

**I'll take a while to update because I wrote that all day. LOL. But I hope you guys stick to this, I will. =)**


	2. Hello Marissa Cooper, and Kevin

Newport Beach. She couldn't believe she was back after a good eight months. From no emails or calls from anybody, Marissa felt left out. The first thing she did when she got off the plane was check her cell phone. It was out of service on the boat, and no one had called her on the main phone, so maybe, just maybe.

There were eight voicemails. Four from Summer, one from Kaitlin, two from Julie, and one from… Ryan. Marissa smiled and started listening. Summer acted upset for the first two, but the others, she just told Marissa what was going on in Newport. Kaitlin said how Julie was acting out since her departure, and Julie was saying how much she missed Marissa. Now, Ryan was the one that she was really waiting for.

"Uh, hey, Marissa, it's Ryan. I—I just wanted to say, hey, and what's up. And…" He sighed. "I miss you. It's not fun like it used to be. And, yeah, I'm going to keep you up to date now. I go to Berkeley, but I stay at the Cohen's still. Summer goes to Brown, but don't worry, she's the same old Summer. Seth is starting a school in the fall, I don't know which yet… it's between him and Summer right now. Um, Kirsten has a baby. Sophie, and that's about it. I just hope you're having fun. Please say you're having fun." Then he hung up.

Marissa smiled. "Oh God, I miss it." She started to text until she heard a familiar laugh. She lifted her head and stared in awe. There they were. Summer, Seth, and Ryan, and wait… there's another. _Taylor_?

Ryan and Taylor hugged and kissed. Marissa's jaw dropped. Taylor started walking away when Summer turned her head to the right. "Coop?!?!" she shouted at the top of her lungs. Seth looked and smiled. He ran after Summer to Marissa. They all hugged until Seth let go of Marissa. She stared over at Ryan and smiled.

Summer was about to say something when Ryan started smiling and ran over to Marissa, leaving Taylor. He grabbed her by the waist and pulled her in for a bear hug. They broke off and stared at each other. Marissa shook her head after a good two minutes and looked over to Taylor. "Hey Taylor. Where you off to?" she asked.

"Um, to Italy. I wrote a little before and sent it everywhere, and now, someone responded. I'm just going to meet a publisher," she said nervously. She really didn't feel comfortable with Marissa and Ryan together without her. Ryan was just getting used to being with her, but now Marissa is back into the picture. Taylor wanted to take Ryan with her, but she knew it was too late.

Ryan smiled and looked over at Taylor. "What time is it?" he asked sadly.

"I have to leave, like now," Taylor responded.

Ryan nodded and kissed her. "I'll see you in a month?" he said hopefully.

Taylor nodded and hugged Summer. "I'll see you," Taylor said.

She hugged Seth awkwardly. They still couldn't get over that Taylor was obsessed with Seth three years ago. They broke apart and waved. They all watched Taylor go.

[lovealways]

Ten minutes later, Summer turned to Marissa. "So, I think we should all leave. I know everyone is _dying _to see you. You're mom is going to freak!" she shouted as she grabbed Marissa's arm.

They ran to the car with Seth and Ryan walking slowly behind them. "So, what are you going to do?" Seth asked Ryan out of the blue.

"About…" Ryan said in a dead tone.

"Are you dumb? Marissa. Obviously, it's going to be like before, when even though one of you dates, you're going to end up with each other."

Ryan shook his head in doubt. He was just too stupid to figure it all out.

[lovealways]

They got to the Cohen house, and they had agreed to surprise everyone with the return of Marissa. Summer walked in looking sad. "Hey guys," she said. Seth came in and put his arm around Summer's shoulders.

Kirsten smiled at Sandy. "Feeling sad about Taylor's departure?" she asked.

"Yeah, but I think I got a little happier after. We saw an old friend," she said, looking at Seth with a smile on her face.

Julie smirked, she obviously didn't care. But Kaitlin looked at her mother with a shocked face. Julie still didn't care. Then Kaitlin nudged her shoulder. Julie looked up at Kaitlin and then realized. "Wait, you guys don't have any other friends other than Ryan, and he's walking up right now. Where is she?" she asked, not sounding that excited.

Sandy crooked one of his massive eyebrows. "What's happening, I don't—"

Marissa walked in.

Julie screamed and did a jump and run towards Marissa. She threw herself at her. Kaitlin's smile got bigger and she ran to her mom and sister.

Sandy smiled and went, "Hey, hey!" Kirsten was laughing, and Ryan was enjoying the view of Marissa's golden hair, he had missed that hair, and now, that hair was replaced with dark blonde.

The family hug was broken off, and Marissa hugged Sandy and Kirsten. "Oh Mariss, I'm so glad to have you back. Let's go out," Julie said.

Marissa laughed. No one could explain the happiness she felt. She loved being back home. But there was this emptiness in her heart where Ryan used to be, and now she knows she won't have him back. He's with Taylor. "Yeah, let's go."

[lovealways]

Julie, Marissa, and Kaitlin left the Cohen house and walked to the diner. The caught up, mostly, they talked about Jimmy. How he was, what his life is like now, and if he had gotten beaten up again. They were walking on the peer with cones of ice cream (except for Julie) when Marissa saw the back of the head of someone who had blonde, short hair, and he was wearing a muscle shirt. She thought she would see a joint or cigarette in his hand, but there wasn't. He was leaning on the fence and rubbing his head. He looked troubled, and Marissa didn't know why. She just knew that she didn't want to see him.

She turned around. "Marissa, what are you doing?" Kaitlin asked. "The diner is that way."

"Yeah," she breathed. "I just got a little head rush." Marissa turned back around and speed walked to the diner. Julie and Kaitlin just followed with strange looks.

They sat down and ordered their food. "So Mariss, other than seeing your dad, how was working on a boat?" Julie asked. Marissa looked out the window with a scared look in her eyes. She did not want to see him, at all. "Marissa?"

She zoned back into the conversation. "Huh? Sorry, um, it was fun. Sometimes it was hard, but it was still great, to uh, meet new people," she said, preoccupied.

"What's wrong?" Kaitlin asked.

"Nothing," Marissa replied.

Kaitlin didn't buy it. "No, there's something wrong," she said, trying to find clues.

The door opened and Marissa's eyes shot straight to it. "Um, guys I need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back," Marissa said. Kaitlin got up so Marissa could slide out of the booth. She speed walked to the direction of the bathroom.

She got into the hallway where the bathrooms were and exhaled. She was free. Until someone hit the wall. She looked to her left and saw Kevin. "Well, well, you came back. I thought your plans were to leave and never come back," he said.

"Well, plans always change," Marissa said, kind of out of breath.

"Look, Marissa, I just wanted to say… I screwed up, bad. I honestly didn't think. I wasn't thinking," he explained.

She rolled her eyes. "Sure you weren't."

"I wasn't. And for these six months, I didn't know what to do. I missed you, Marissa. I really, really, like you. More than I've liked other girls," he confessed.

"I don't ca—" She started.

But Kevin's lips crashed onto hers. And he held her head there. His hands slid up her shirt and groped her waist. He moved his hands all over her body, and Marissa pulled back. "Get off of me," she forced. He kept trying to kiss her. "Stop. Get off of me," she muttered. She didn't want anyone to hear her screams. She shoved him off and ran into the bathroom. Her heart was pounding, and she was really worried.

She whipped out her phone and dialed Summer's number, knowing she was with Ryan and Seth. "Hey Sum, can you come and meet me at the diner in like, fifteen minutes. Bring Ryan and Seth with you," she said. She hung up and breathed deeply.


	3. Kiss N Tell?

**A/N: I'm sorry for the wait. My computer broke. So I hope you guys like it. I'm kind of having writers block for this story. I really don't know what to do yet. So, if I take a while, I'm REALLY sorry.**

Someone banged on the door. "Marissa!" Kaitlin shouted. "Open up, it's just me!"

Marissa sighed and opened the door. "Hey," she said.

"Where have you been? Mom and I are just sitting out there looking like morons. What's going on?" she asked, honestly worried about her sister.

Marissa shrugged. "I just called Summer back. She called me earlier. She, Ryan, and Seth are going to pick me up soon."

She slowly walked out of the bathroom with Kaitlin and walked to her table. Kevin was sitting with his friends, but staring at Marissa. Marissa shook off the memory of his kisses. "Marissa, honey, where have you been?" she asked.

"In the bathroom." She saw Summer, Seth, and Ryan through the window walking into the diner. Summer looked worried. "Mom, Sum, Seth, and Ryan are here. I'm going to hang out with them, if that's alright."

Julie nodded and stood up. "We needed to leave anyways. Gordon just called and he needs to talk to me," she said.

Kaitlin smiled and followed her mother out the door.

Summer walked in and saw Marissa. "Hey, what's the matter?" she asked.

Seth followed. "Yeah, are you okay?" he asked.

They all sat down in the same booth Julie was just sitting in. Summer and Seth's backs were to the door, so they couldn't see Kevin. But Ryan sat down next to Marissa, and he had the view. "Did you know he was here?" he asked Marissa, as he jerked his head towards Kevin. He was still staring at Marissa.

Marissa nodded. Summer whipped her head around and stared at him. "Sum!" Marissa whined. She didn't want Kevin knowing they were talking about him.

Summer whipped her head back around. "What?" she asked.

Seth turned his head to her ear. "You have to be stealth," he whispered, but loud enough for Ryan and Marissa to hear.

Ryan leaned closer to Marissa and pulled something out of his back pocket. "I have something for you." He took out a folded piece of paper and smoothed it out onto the table.

"What is this?" she asked, without reading it.

He nodded towards the paper. "Read it."

Marissa nodded and held the paper as she read it. She had the best concentration, and that's what Ryan missed the most about her.

Ryan looked over at Seth with a smile. Seth smiled back. Summer looked confused. Seth put his index finger up, waiting for Marissa to exclaim.

She put down the paper with a smile. "Oh, my, God!" she shouted. She threw her hands over his shoulders and squeezed him tight.

Kevin looked over again and stared at them hugging. He hated it. He stormed out with a huff.

"What is it?" Summer asked. She hated not knowing what was happening.

Marissa let go of Ryan and looked at Summer with a smile. "They are letting me go to Berkeley." Summer smiled with Seth. Marissa hugged Ryan one last time. "I know, it's the last year, but I can always catch up. You know how fast I am," Marissa said.

They laughed, and drank milkshakes until they decided to call it a night. They all drove in the same car, obviously. And they all ended up at the Cohen house. Seth and Summer walked up the stairs to Seth's room, while Marissa and Ryan walked into the pool house.

"I can't believe she's back," Summer said as she hit Seth's bed. Seth followed. "Can you?"

Seth kissed her cheek. "Nope. Fab Four are back together, finally." He kissed her again. "Hey, when do you have to go back to GEORGE?" he asked.

Summer sighed. She had just come back to Newport for a weekend, and she had forgotten how much she missed it. And GEORGE wasn't that fun anyways. It was all about animals, and Summer had forgotten how much she didn't really care for animals. She missed being the old Summer. She missed hanging out with Seth, and Ryan. And now, Marissa had come back into her life. She wanted to hang out with her more, you know, just in case something happened. She needed to catch up with her. This weekend was amazing, and she felt like she couldn't leave again.

[lovealways]

Ryan fell on his bed. Marissa sat on the foot of the bed and started biting her nails. "I missed you Ryan," she mumbled.

He sat up, but was still far from Marissa. "What did you say?" he asked. He already knew what she said, but he needed to hear it from her face. He didn't want to look at her back anymore.

She sighed and turned around to look into his beautiful eyes. "I missed you, Ryan Atwood. You were an amazing boyfriend," she announced.

Ryan nodded. He knew they were never friends. They could never be _just _friends. Everyone knew it. He watched Marissa. He watched her move up to him, and kissed him. Ryan knew it was wrong. He knew that their body moving perfectly in synch was really bad. But he couldn't stop kissing her. Ryan missed the taste of her lips. He just missed her.

She unbuttoned his shirt, but that's when his hands hit her shoulders. "Marissa. Wait, we can't do this." She sat on his feet. And he wiped her lip gloss off of his bottom lip. He buttoned up his white tee, and kept looking up from his fingers, to Marissa. He finally finished. Now, he couldn't avoid her. "I'm dating Taylor. This is just, wrong." He breathed. "I'm sorry."

Marissa breathed heavily and got off of his bed. She kept stuttering. "I—I'm sorry. It's my f—fault. I really just—missed you. I—I'm just gonna go," she said awkwardly. "Thanks…"

Ryan sighed as he saw Marissa slam the door shut. He lay his head back down on the pillow. This was the worst mistake of his life. It was all – the worst.

**Sorry. Short chapter…**


	4. Party At Berkeley

1 MONTH LATER

Taylor practically skipped into the Cohen house in the morning. She was just so excited to see Ryan after being away for so long. She sneaked into the pool house and then realized all the curtains were pulled down. Ryan never slept like that. He liked waking up to the sunshine. What was wrong? She looked around the pool house to see if anything was different. Nothing really – except that there was a new picture of Ryan and Marissa. Oh great, Taylor thought. Just what she needed, to hear about Marissa.

Ryan rubbed his eyes. He could hear clicking of shoes on the hardwood. "Taylor," he grunted. "You're here."

She smiled and clapped as she jumped up and down. "Yes, I am!" she shouted. As Ryan sat up, she ran to him and jumped on him. Just to feel him, she felt her heart beating the normal way. Ryan kissed her. "So, what's new?" she asked. She was still sitting on him, but he moved her onto his bed.

Ryan yawned. "Nothing really. I just have a lot to do with Berkeley. I might have to stay there for the night," he explained.

Taylor's face dropped. "Oh," she whispered.

"Hey—" Ryan said as he brought her close. "Tomorrow, you're all mine. We'll go out. Just today _has _to be dedicated to Berkeley." Ryan got up and stretched. He walked into the bathroom and came out in five minutes. His hair was all wet. Taylor was still there, sitting on his bed. "You know, you can stay here as I get ready, drop me off at Berkeley, and we can talk for all that time," he proposed.

Taylor's smile appeared again. "I have so much to tell you."

So that's just what happened. Taylor followed Ryan around and told him about Italy. She drove him to school, and said goodbye for the night.

Ryan walked in and walked into his dorm. Yeah, he had one, but he rarely used it. He only slept there if he had an early class, or way too much work. His roommate was really nice about it too—he usually had girls over, so it was nice for Ryan to get away.

He picked up the rest of his books from his dorm and went into the café in Berkeley. They had some of the best coffee. Ryan used to bring some home for Sandy and Kirsten at the end of the day. They absolutely loved it.

He sat on a little circle table and put his backpack on the other chair. He took out his laptop and notebook. Ryan tapped his pencil on his notebook as he read his test questions on his laptop. Ryan drank another sip of his black coffee.

"Ryan, my man!" Henry, his roommate shouted as he moved Ryan's backpack and sat down. "What're doing here man? We don't have classes today, you're never here when we don't have classes!" he said, all hyped up on coffee, Ryan thought.

Ryan smiled. "Nothing man. I just have all of this to do. What's up with you though?" he asked, he wanted anything to get him out of doing work right now.

"Still hung over. Last night's party was killer. Should've came." Ryan shrugged. "We're having another tonight. I think you should come. You have been missing out on a lot of Berkeley's parties," Henry said.

He might have been right. Ryan was in college, yes, but he hasn't been living like he was in college. He has been living like he was still in high school. Maybe he should go tonight. It might actually be fun. "Sure," he shrugged.

"Great, be in our room at nine. We'll go then." With that, Henry drank his last sip of coffee, left the cup on the table and left.

Ryan was dedicated now to finish all of his homework. He needed to now that he was going out. After two hours, he finished about three quarters of all of his homework, and he downed four cups of coffee. He was on his third last question when he heard taps of heels.

"Hey!" Marissa shouted. She sat down and moved Henry's empty cup of coffee to the side. "What're you doing here?" she asked.

Ryan looked up, but didn't move his head. "Same thing you're doing," he said in a monotone.

Marissa's smile looked awkward. Everything has been different since she and Ryan almost hooked up. She was scared they would never be normal again. She giggled nervously. "Getting settled down in a dorm?" she asked.

He dropped his pencil and sighed. "Never mind, then," he said.

Marissa sighed and looked around before looking back at Ryan. She put her elbows on the table and leaned closer to Ryan. She whispered, "Ryan, why aren't you talking to me? Yes, I messed up, and yes, I may still have feelings for you, but you can't blame me! I've known you for too long, and thought of you forever. It's hard to get you off of my mind. For God's sakes, I had about five pictures of us in my room on the boat." She leaned back and crossed her arms. Ryan opened his mouth. "Whatever Ryan. Do whatever you want to do. I'll try to stop thinking about you." She got up and left.

Ryan couldn't stop thinking about their fight as he finished his homework. He probably did those three questions wrong because of her. He sighed, got up, and brought all of his books into his dorm.

At 8:50 P.M., Ryan sat down on his bed. He was all dressed, wearing a tight, long sleeved, grayish-blue shirt with blue jeans. He opened up his textbook and started reading it before Henry came. But soon enough, he did, and they left. Henry was wearing an Ed Hardy t shirt and blue jeans. "This party is gonna be amazing. I'm glad you decided to come, man!" Henry said as they walked down the halls. They finally reached the dorm room and saw about fifty people already. The party had just started too.

After a while, Ryan was sitting on the couch with a red plastic cup, full of beer. He took a sip and looked around of all the people dancing. He smiled and Henry dancing like a drunken animal; which he was. Soon enough, Ryan saw Marissa on a barstool, looking at her cup. He walked up and sat on the empty barstool next to hers. ""Hey," he whispered into her ear.

She jumped. "Oh, hey," she said sadly.

"Look, Marissa, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to act all weird. It's just, it's hard to be just friends with you, and you know that. We talked about it all the time."

She nodded. "I'm sorry too, for freaking out. Do you just want to have a good time at college?" she asked. "I'd really like to."

He nodded. They both started goofing off, and drinking. They were truly having a good time. By the end of the party, Ryan and Marissa were back to normal.

They were walking in the hallways back to their dorms. "My first college party- I'm so proud," Marissa joked.

"Yeah. I know how you feel," Ryan added.

Marissa stopped walking. "Wait, what?" she asked, completely dumbfounded.

Ryan turned around to face her. "What?"

"You haven't been to a college party yet?" she asked. Ryan shook his head. "Why not?"

Ryan jerked his head to the other side of the hallway and they started walking again. "Well because I don't really live here, so I don't go to parties," he explained.

Marissa nodded. "So, why don't you live here?"

He shrugged. "I really haven't been too social. Now I'm starting to think I should pack my bags. Anyways, there is too much work to do and I can't keep commuting back and forth."

Marissa smiled. They got to her dorm and Ryan said goodbye at the door. "Hey, Ryan, come in, I'm not even tired."

He was hesitant. But obviously, he said okay. You could never say no to Marissa Cooper.

They talked about Marissa's absence, and how everything was on the boat. Then it came to the awkward discussion of things before Marissa left. Then, after a bottle of water or two, Marissa passed out, and so did Ryan.

**I hope you like it!**


	5. I Love You Taylor

They next day, Marissa woke with an arm under her head. The arm was familiar, it was Ryan. She couldn't mistake Ryan's arm if it was covered in caramel and if he had three long sleeved shirts on, not just one. She lifted her head off of his arm and slowly turned it. Her hair was flowing off her shoulders like she had just washed and dried it. I guess that was the perk of being pretty—waking up beautiful.

Marissa smiled and shifted her weight onto her other arm. Just staring at Ryan made her mood suddenly brighten. He was sleeping on his back, and his legs were spread shoulder width apart. His head was tilted to the right, and his other arm was on his stomach. He was just, beautiful.

She just wanted to kiss him, but she knew she couldn't. Ryan was with Taylor, and she just had to accept that. Marissa was enjoying this moment of creepiness, but it all was ruined. Ryan's phone started vibrating, so Marissa grabbed it off her bed and looked who was calling. Taylor Townsend. Marissa sighed, nothing could be perfect anymore.

Instead of answering it herself, Marissa shoved Ryan awake and handed him the phone. She knew if she answered it first thing in the morning, there would be questions.

Ryan lifted his head up stared at his stomach, then he looked at Marissa, then back at his stomach. "Huh? Oh," Ryan said as he looked at the phone. He answered it. "Hey Taylor." He put his head down and rubbed his eyes with his right hand. "Yeah, I'll be home soon. I just gotta jump in the shower. Yeah, see you soon. Love you too," he finished.

Marissa was now sitting on her bed with one leg over the side of the bed, and the other crossed, touching her thigh. Her arms were flopped on part of the bed in front her, she looked at Ryan was a sad expression. "So I guess you better be going."

Ryan sat up. "Yeah, I guess I do."

Marissa got off her bed before any more awkward eye contact happened. She looked through her dresser and put her Berkeley sweater over her tank top. Now her black sweats and pink sweater with grey writing were just on her, and she felt so unloved, and uncared for.

Marissa crossed her arms and tapped her foot. "Ryan, please just think about moving here. You won't get the full college experience until you do. The commute is just terrible. And it would be nice to know more than two people here," she said.

He stood up and stared at Marissa. "I promise you, I will," he said with a smile.

Marissa smiled and hugged Ryan. "Have fun with Taylor today." With that, Ryan left.

[lovealways]

Marissa wanted to call Summer, and ask her to hang out, but she knew Summer had school today, or GEORGE, she didn't know. So she decided to take her laptop and walk down to the café. First, she had to change. She put on a black tank top and jeans with blue converse. She went down and took the first seat available on the couch. It was a double seat, so she was waiting for anyone to sit next to her so they could socialize.

Soon, somebody did. "Hey," he said. He took a sip of his coffee and put his arm on the couch around Marissa.

She looked at him and his outfit. It was a short sleeved Ed Hardy shirt with blue jeans. They were all riffled up. "Doing the walk of shame?" she asked.

The man smiled at her. "I might be," he said with a smirk. He took another sip of his coffee and then put out his arm that was over the couch and offered her his hand. "I'm Henry."

She shook it. "Marissa."

He put his arm over the couch again. Marissa looked back at her computer and started typing things. She could feel his wonderful hazy brown eyes staring at her. She smiled and shook her head. She was already getting to know people, very attractive people.

Henry had dirty blonde, short hair with brown eyes. His face was perfect. No blemishes, no pimples, no acne what so ever. Marissa just wanted to take his perfectly tanned face, put her hands on it, and kiss his red, thin lips. But when she thought about it, it got clearer. This guy looked like Ryan.

"I think I've seen you before. Have we had a hookup yet?" he asked with a scrunch of his eyes.

Marissa looked at him again and laughed. "No. I just got here. This is my first week."

"Huh. Well I know I've seen you. Were you at that guy's party last night? Joey Rosson in 215?" Marissa nodded. "You were talking to Ryan Atwood, right?" She nodded again. "That's where I've seen you!" Henry snapped. "My roommate Ryan has pictures of you in our room!"

"Ryan is your roommate?" she asked.

"Yeah, how do you know him?"

Marissa wondered how to explain. But then, the simplest answer came to her. "We went to high school together." Then she thought of something else. "We _were _boyfriend and girlfriend. Wait—Ryan said he doesn't live here. How do you know he has pictures with me?"

"He still has all this living room stuff in the dorm. He technically lives here, he just doesn't sleep here," Henry explained.

Marissa looked away from her computer when one thought came into her mind. "Ryan still has pictures with me up?" she asked quietly.

"Yeah, he has this one picture that he won't explain. It's you two walking on a ferris wheel with thumbs up to the camera. What's that about?" Henry asked.

Oh no, all these memories flushed into her mind. "Sorry Henry, I have to go." She shut her laptop. "I'll… see you later?" Marissa rushed out of the café.

[lovealways]

"Ryan!" Taylor shouted as Ryan walked through the buffet doors. She ran up and hugged him. "How was Berkeley?" she asked as they sat down.

Ryan nodded. "It was great. I went to a party, it was alright."

"Oh yeah? Well, that's good. Was Marissa there?" she asked nervously.

He nodded again. "Yeah, we talked a lot. It was good catching up again," he said. Ryan didn't dare to bring up that they slept in the same bed last night. Or that they got drunk together. "So, I was thinking that I should start, _being _at Berkeley_. _You know what I mean?" he said. He was trying to hint to Taylor that he was going to move there.

"Are you saying that you want to move there?" Taylor asked with a sad face. Ryan nodded. She exhaled. "Well, that's alright. I'm fine. Don't worry, that's actually a great idea. The commute is crap."

He kissed her. "Are you sure about this?"

She nodded. "Please! Live your college life." She got up. "Why don't we just break up so you can hook up with random strangers!" she shouted.

Ryan shook his head. "Taylor, I'm not going to break up with you. I love you Taylor. I just, think I should _go _to college."

Taylor sat down again. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry Taylor. You just need to get it through your head, I don't want Marissa. I love you. I'm not going to cheat on you."

Taylor smiled and kissed Ryan. "You better not," she joked. They kissed again.

[lovealways]

"I don't know what to do Sum!" Marissa shouted into her cell phone.

Summer smacked her lips together. "I don't know what to tell you Coop. Ryan is with Taylor now, you have to get over him. Just don't do the other stuff you did with Volchuk," she said. Marissa could hear Summer running. "I have to go Mariss. I'll call you tonight. Promise me to be smart."


	6. There's Always A Dance

Marissa went around campus that night. She needed to get her mind off of Ryan. It was cloudy, and dark. Marissa heard laughing of a girl, and she looked over. Henry was talking to her, obviously flirting. Marissa laughed, knowing what it was like, talking to Henry. That's when Henry looked over at Marissa. He ditched the girl he was talking to and ran over to Marissa. "Marissa!" he screamed. Marissa laughed. He caught up to her, and they started to walk. "What was with you leaving earlier?"

She shrugged. "It's just that me and Ryan have a lot of history. It's hard to deal with everything, y'know what I mean?"

He nodded. What was he supposed to say to that? He wasn't about to just open up like a book. He cleared his throat, signaling to change the subject. "So, there's this dance—"

Marissa stopped walking and raised her arms so they were at her waist, flat, like she was about to give someone a hug. Henry stopped walking and looked at her, feeling awkward himself. "Wait, Berkeley has dances?" she asked, holding in her smile.

Henry laughed. "Yeah, they hold one at least once a month."

Marissa finally let out her smile, and then they continued to keep walking. "Okay, sorry. You were saying?"

He smiled. "So, the dance, I was just wondering if you would want to go… with me."

Marissa smiled a sympathetic smile. "I don't know…" Henry stopped smiling, and just felt embarrassed. "It's just like, my first week here, and I don't even know you. I mean, all I know is that you like to hook up with people, a lot." Henry smirked. Marissa laughed. "And I don't know. I just don't want to be one of _those _girls."

Henry grabbed her arm to make her stop walking. Marissa looked at his beautiful brown eyes. "Marissa, if it makes you feel better, I don't consider you one of those girls. First of all, you weren't drunk or hung over the first time we met. Second of all, you didn't jump me yet."

Marissa laughed. "Is this a casual dance, or formal?" Henry smirked.

[lovealways]

Seth ran to his cell phone. "Hello?"

"Seth!" Summer shouted.

"Oh, hey. Where are you?" he asked as he sat on his bed.

Summer coughed. "In a building, somewhere. I just wanted to talk to you," she said sadly.

"Oh, that's nice… Summer, is there something else you need to talk about?" he asked.

She laughed. "You know me too well. My dad called me, and he said that he wanted to have dinner again."

Seth rolled his eyes and made a face. He felt all gross. Summer's dad always made him feel dumb, and nerdy. He really didn't want to talk to him again. "Well, have fun with that Summer. I'll talk to you later…?"

"Cohen!" she shouted. "My dad wants to have dinner with us on Saturday night, are you free?" she asked, assured that Seth was going to reply with a sarcastic tone.

Seth sighed. "Fine," he said annoyingly.

Summer smiled, feeling accomplished. "Alright. Five o'clock, I'll meet you at your house beforehand." And she hung up.

[lovealways]

Taylor Townsend got dressed up in a casual, yet elegant dress. It was a red one, which exaggerated her curves. She curled her hair and wore ruby red lipstick. Now, all she had to do was wait for Ryan to come pick her up. She had convinced him to go to Berkeley's dance; only if she was allowed to go with him. Then, she promised that he couldn't have to do anything like that again. It was eight o'clock when Ryan showed up at her house. They kissed, and hugged, then, Ryan escorted her to his car.

Ryan was in an all black suit, which looked really good on him, because just by looking, you could see he didn't want to be there, and that was a great look. Lot's of people were already at the dance, including Marissa Cooper. Ryan looked over at her with a straight face, and saw that she looked back. Taylor squeezed Ryan's hand after she noticed what he was looking at. "Ryan, do you want to go get something to drink?" Ryan nodded, and Taylor pulled him to the table. His eyes were still locked on Marissa until someone else's head blocked his view.

A slow song was on, and Henry popped out of behind a curtain and grabbed Marissa's hand and pulled her to the dance floor. Her hands were holding his neck, and his were gripping her waist. Her dress was rough, and was fun to bunch up, so that's what Henry kept doing. Marissa's dress was a light pink, and her hair was flat as a board, but that was a great look on her. Henry was wearing a typical suit. But he didn't have a jacket on, and his tie was a little loose.

"You look absolutely gorgeous, Marissa," Henry said, a little drowsily.

Marissa raised an eyebrow. "You turning gay on me Henry?" she jokingly asked.

Henry scoffed. "Me, gay? I'm too straight to be gay."

Marissa laughed. "Okay, I believe you. But thanks. You look pretty handsome yourself."

Taylor was dancing with Ryan. With her heels on, she was a bit taller than Ryan, which made him think about the time Marissa and him went shopping, about four years ago. Marissa had tried on heels, and she towered over Ryan. He sunk to the ground, got up and Marissa kissed him. That was the day Marissa shoplifted. Ryan exhaled. "I love you Ryan Atwood," he heard Taylor say.

He looked over into her eyes. "I love you too Taylor." She keeps saying it to him. It's like that she has to make sure that he still loves her every living minute. The song ended, and Taylor and Ryan broke off, and they went to go talk in a corner. People cleared off of the dance floor, and it cleared the view for Ryan and Taylor to watch Marissa, because they both did. She was kissing Henry, with open mouth.


End file.
